Tuesday, 16 August 2016

Windows to Motherhood #5 Yasmine

This is Yasmine...

"I have two beautiful boys called George and Jackson.  George will be 2 next month and Jackson is 8 months old.  They could not be more different.  George is a bundle of energy who constantly wants to be stimulated and Jackson is chilled out in every single way, he takes things in his stride. My boys are Yin and Yang, their connection however, most days is perfect."

Motherhood began the day we saw that positive sign on the test.  Even though it seemed so surreal and not possible.  The little speck of cells was my child in that instant and it was my job to nurture and protect it in anyway I could."

"We own our own business so officially I work two days a week but realistically there are no set hours.  Sometimes I have to work whilst the boys nap or are engaged in an activity. It makes me feel torn at times.  Our business is what allows us to have the lifestyle we have and provides us with our beautiful home so I know that I need to work on aspects to help make it a success but the distraction it creates from being 100% present is hard.  Its a hard situation to understand if you don't have your own business, you can't just clock off at 5:30pm, come home and relax there is constantly something to discuss, do or resolve."

"I would love to tell you that I am Mary Poppins and I have the patience of a saint but I don't.  I'm caring, loving and devoted to my children but I'm also impatient and get frustrated easily.  Every day I feel guilty for not doing something right; feeding Jackson a jar instead of a home made concoction, letting George watch the 'Gruffalo' one too many times but I also know that in that instant and in that moment I'm doing the best that I know how to do.  No one tells you the inner conflict and turmoil you experience as a mother and even if they did, you can't empathise until you make the journey yourself."

"I've never been overly confident with my body anyway but whilst pregnant I was the most confident with it that I have ever been. Two pregnancies pretty much back to back did leave me feeling a little ravaged to say the least!  I'm also not ashamed to admit that now I am finished having babies I am on a mission to reclaim my body.  It's seen two births in two years and is now receiving the TLC it deserves for giving me my beautiful boys."

"My mind changes daily as a mother. My beliefs about everything flip and twist constantly.  It has taught my mind to be more fluid, more flexible and more giving in approaches to everything.  Going into motherhood I had a very set belief of how I was going to be and how my child was to be raised and the actual reality is so far removed from that, its actually quite scary."

"The world has become so much more of a fearful place.  Situations that you don't even think about pre baby are the ones that occupy your mind.  Every situation comes with an element of danger.  That being said it also makes you appreciate the simple things, the world around us is there to be explored and there is no better way to do than with your children."

"As clichéd  as it sounds, motherhood to me is a roller coaster. I can be laughing at the boy's antics one minute and crying the next. The emotions I feel towards my boys leave knots in my belly and the thought of anything happening to them, leaves me gasping for breath. Nothing can ever prepare you for the experience you are about to embark on.  These little beings are your whole world and to a certain degree become your identity.  They in no uncertain terms, my everything."

"The expectation I had of motherhood pre children is so far removed from the reality that I can't even remember what it was! Nothing can explain the love you feel for your children.  You know you will love your children but nothing compares to the bolt of sheer adoration and infatuation when you look into your child's eyes."

Thank you Yasmine xxx

Windows to Motherhood is an ongoing film photography project. You can see #1, #2#3 and #4 or all editions here. If you would like to know or get involved and tell your story please get in touch at info@farliephotography.co.uk 

If you would like more information on portrait sessions or any of my other photography services please see my website.


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